Here’s To

Here’s To

A brief one as I stand in line for 2018

Here’s to the one who said it was going to be fine, when I was sure it wasn’t.

To the one who wanted a catch up but didn’t let me say a thing.

To the one whose actions contradict their words

To the one who didn’t ask questions and just sent support

To the one who never makes me feel welcome

To the one who thought I had no feelings of my own to hurt.

To the ones I hurt more than I knew.

To the one I wish I ended things better with

To the friends I disappointed by my own lack of courage or back bone

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Who We Are

Who We Are

I base a lot of my self worth on the opinions of others. And then some.

I base a lot of my self worth on the opinions of others and in long drawn-out comparisons that leave me feeling stale. And every time, it ends with “why not me”.

It’s something that’s been there for a lot of my life. My school was competitive, elitist – and whilst it taught me some incredibly important moral values, it didn’t see us all as equal. Some were just more equal than others. Ten year old me wanted to be good at sports but I couldn’t because I didn’t partake in extra training outside of school, I wanted to wear the bulky Tiffany necklaces and own a Mini Cooper, things that divided the social standing, gave you a sense of “identity”, and initiated you in the unspoken secret society of kids who I believed to be undeniably happy, the only problems in their lives being whether or not they wanted to curl their hair in the morning.

It wasn’t jealousy so much as it was thinking, I wasn’t good enough or happy until I had these things.

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Know Your Self Worth

Know Your Self Worth

Knowing your self worth is saying no to something that doesn’t add value to anything, much less yourself

It’s taking a step back to look after yourself when you get a gut-wrenching feeling

It’s holding your tongue when the argument starts, not just for the other person, but for your own peace of mind

It’s not holding onto the pain of being ignored in the group chat because you know it’s not intentional

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It’s Not You, It’s Definitely Me

It’s Not You, It’s Definitely Me

I feel like this is some kind of 4pm slump Buzzfeed article. You know, one of those that try to change your life with deep, meaningful posts that you tend to forget about once you take that quiz on ‘What IKEA furniture are you?’

I promise it won’t be like that.

I wrote this piece last year to air my own grievances (which may be considered an immature reason to write such a post in the first place, especially one that deals with a topic like this) for the simple reason that I don’t believe that one’s anger and frustration should interfere when offering advice.

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