I’ve always been really hard on myself. Not in a ‘give me sympathy’ kind of way, more that I can get anxious and guilty about anything. Anything. at. all. It’s a work in progress but there are times when I find myself beating myself up for little, miniscule things, and blaming myself for other people’s actions or lack thereof.
I’m still in the habit of letting one thought completely change my mood (and forget that happiness is a choice). So, for my own sake, I’ve decided to draw up a list to remind myself of the things that I purposely make myself “feel bad” for.
A flower can’t bloom all year round, right? A cringe idea but it’s true, and neither can you.
It’s a-okay to:
Just want to curl into a ball in the corner of a coffee shop and flaff about online for hours
To realise that just because something doesn’t go the way you planned it doesn’t mean that it’s not going right
To eat several penguin bars and skip dinner, again.
To start a workout and not have it in your heart to continue.
To put that really nice selfie online and fail to mention that there are 49 others that didn’t make it.
To apply for that job you’re probably under qualified for.
To have periods of time when your chest is heavy for no apparent reason (although if this is a constant, talk to someone).
To get angry at people’s misconceptions of mental health and rant about it online
To understand that you are completely worthy of the good attention you get
To sing Bohemian Rhapsody (including guitar parts) so loudly that your neighbours call around to check if you’re ok
To cancel on someone, twice, because you’re just not feeling right
To decline that date for no real reason
But it’s not okay:
To let someone’s inability to love you dictate how you feel about yourself
To let yourself get carried away with ugly reasons as to why he didn’t text back or why she cancelled or why they didn’t invite you.
To convince yourself you’re annoying someone.
To see yourself as anything less than an incredible human being that has every right to be on this earth as everyone else does.
Still a work in progress but then again, who isn’t?